The Sleepless Nights Continue
The sleepless nights have been going on now for a couple weeks again. They just keep getting harder and harder to get through. The sleepless nights have been not only making my nights long, but have been making my days harder and longer to get through, and harder to find the energy to keep going on. I've been left with having to pick and choose what is the most important to get done through my every day life. The only thing that is on my priority is work before everything else right now--to make sure I attend every day. But the sleepless nights have been making it harder.
I've been fully booked every weekend
The anxiety is high thinking about how I will manage to get through upcoming events. Since I haven't been sleeping well at night, I am left drained, depressed and feeling like everything seems impossible. I am left with no energy to do anything. It's like a car without fuel, having trouble starting. It needs fuel and without it, it can't go anywhere. I am feeling the same way. I am dragging myself out of bed every day just to get through work. I can't imagine adding anything else on top of it.
The horrible nights have gotten so bad, instead of tossing and turning in bed, I'd rather stay up all night. I find because my body doesn't move at night, as I am sound asleep, in one spot, that's when I wake up in agony from pain and stiffness as high as a 10 on the scale. It's so bad I feel like a Tin Man full of rust.
This is where I wake up in tears, while everyone else is sound asleep
In tears, because it's been too many days and nights of having my body be in so much pain. It scares me, at times the pain gets so bad, it feels so deep in my bones through my back and chest. It feels like my bones will break from the pain. I just wants to rip through my back and chest from the pain, if that makes any sense at all. My body feels like it is on fire. This is how I know my inflammation gets so high at night. The fan is right beside my bed, all year round to help.
Heating pads, hot showers, and moving beds
All I can do right now, through these awful nights is take my pain medication and use my heating pad (if I am able to get up plug it in). Some nights, hubby warms it up for me. But I feel bad waking him up. What else helps me is to try get up to take a hot shower. But if it's been a couple nights of bad sleep, this gets harder for me to do. Especially since my body has been feeling very weak at this time.
I also find getting up slowly, trying to move around my room quietly and stretch a bit is how I start to find a bit of relief. But once I go back to laying down, I start to feel the same again. I wish there was some sort of moving bed that existed. Maybe there is and I don't know about it. Haha! But I think this would help me get a better night of sleep so much.
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