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How soon they forget I have AS

I'm a little frustrated..o.k., a LOT frustrated. Once I got answers after too many yrs of searching for an answer to 'why am I tired, why do I need another hip/knee/rotator cuff replaced?' I sent my husband, daughter, SIL and all loved 1's the relevant articles, research papers plus copies I got from the RA I see. Along w/ al the results from all the specialists I see because of the AS.

At 1st, hubby was very supportive & understanding, as was my daughter and others. When hubby made plans for us to go somewhere just to "get out of the house," I would agree because COVID or not, I hate being home 24/7, 365 days ....ugh. Now? I'm a certified hermit.

But then I would wake up & pain would envelope me, my eyes were not mine, ( someone must of stole them in the night.) These eyes I woke up to were like looking at darki-sh clouds or spiderwebs & it felt as though there were little hard needles poking the back of my eyes. I told hubby I couldn't go anywhere. He would look a tad upset bu tried his best to understand. That kind of empathy went on for awhile. The same with my daughter. She would not call as often to see if I could watch the 3 grand children that I love so much but can cause so much stress, lol.

Fast forward less than 2 yrs-hubby is getting irritated with why I don't have supper ready, why I don't want to go out just for a cup of coffee at our usual coffee hang-out. What's wrong with me, why am I so tired...all questions he now asks. He tells me, "It's good to get some fresh air, u need to get out of the house."

My daughter is going through some tough times w/ her hubby and of course 3 kids. Two are teen girls...'nugh said! The son is being weened off of 24/7 video gaming, ( not w/out hissy fits though.)
So lately she's been texting, " So mom, how are u today?" That's when I know to not even answer the text because if I do, that's her way of feeling around to see if I will babysit.

How soon they all seem to forget that most days I have 1 or more appts. Just getting ready to get there is stressful. If I'm able to drive, by the time I get home, I'm in tears, shaking, weak & just head staight for the bed. I shut the phone off. They seem to forget how on most days, just going to the store for a few things, ( there's 3 stoes w/ in walking distance,not that I can walk that far, lol,) can take 2 hrs because of the time, looking for the products waiting in line, etc...and all of that causes me stress. Stress seems to always, w/out fail, make any AS symptoms so much worse.

How soon they forget!!!

I think I'm going to start buying poster boards & on the days they seem to forget, I will put them up w/ sayings, facts, whatever has to do w/ AS in women to remind them. Once they remember again, I will take down the boards & replace them w/ all the beautiful pictures I usually hang up.

  1. I just wanted to take a moment to say that I’m so sorry that you’re experiencing so much pain and discomfort and that you’re going through this with your family.


    It can be really hard for people to understand, yes…..but it’s even harder for us who are misunderstood or not understood. And in pain.


    I don’t know what you’re comfortable with or if you’ve already tried this, but I think it would be helpful for you to look on the site and maybe share some of the articles and personal experiences other people I’ve had with your family.


    This way, they can start to understand what you go through and what the reality of this disease is. It would help to show them in person or even email them.


    Here is one thing I wrote:


    https://axialspondyloarthritis.net/living/explaining-diagnosis


    Sending support!

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